In the last year, I’ve heard lots of theories as to why I left Marvin UMC.
- He’s gay. He’ll come out the closet soon.
- Satan caused his fall by finding the chink in his armor: intellectual curiosity.
- He had an affair.
- He was handsomely paid out.
- He lost his faith.
- He’s moving to another church.
- He was spoiled by the rotten apples (atheists, agnostics, etc.).
- His denomination (UMC) excommunicated him for heresy.
- He had sex with something other than his wife.*
If you are scoring at home. (or all by yourself) 9 out of 10 are wrong. To save you the trouble, #7 is true. I am a part of a small group of people that would probably balk at being called a church. But, you can if you like.So, there was no scandal, no scoop. I wasn’t forced out or asked to leave like Kathy, Daniel and others. I am deeply thankful for my time at Marvin. However, I decided to leave because I didn’t want to stay a cog in what I believe is a deeply broken system that rewarded me for being a bad dad and a shitty husband. I am not my job, but I am beloved.
* (FULL DISCLOSURE) I may have had sex with a mermaid in 1984. It was New Year’s and the champagne made me giggly.